Just as I drift off I hear her coughing, pushing off the sheets I rush to her, worried. Pulling out the suction tube to clear her airway. It’s a game that’s played throughout the night. I’m happy she’s home but seeing her unable to sleep just coughing, coughing and still in pain, it breaks my heart. I wish I could do more to take away her pain.
We have become good at looking after her now. Helping to clean her stoma twice sometimes three times a day, helping her with the humidufier machine, suctioning the phlegm throughout the day. As much as her voice annoyed me before I wish I can hear it again.
I can see the pain in her eyes as I comb her hair, hair falling out in clumps. I hold back the tears and joke it off.
That’s all that matters
All we can do is be there for her
Always and forever